Thursday, September 28, 2006

My place in the pond

Somedays you just feel like a small fish- and no I am not fishing for compliments and please no “you’re so special – we love you” pep talk comments today, I am just pondering on kind of the ebb and flow of life. Some days you feel on top of your game- some days you just feel not so important. Today was just one of those days. (Don’t you love the installation sculpture I designed to illustrate this post on smart son’s bedroom carpet today while playing with my smart baby) I am not the kind of person to feel that way often, thankfully- but some days you are just reminded that in all the billions of the people you’re really just a speck (not that one person doesn’t make a difference- I’ll blog on that another day) And even for all the difference you might make- it seems so minute. You know you not the smartest, most beautiful, most talented, most perfect person and wouldn’t probably even make the top 1000 in the world in any of those categories- you just feel supremely mediocre and somewhat mundane and very replaceable. Although, life is no popularity contest but do you ever wonder just how many people’s top 100 favorite people to be around list you’d be on. I won’t attempt to wrap it up in a neat moralized package about how we are all special. I think these days and our emotions are often there to make us think. The questions are of big, but definitely worth the reflection. There is a part of a talk by Neal A Maxwell that I like that says depending on how you live your life you can “touch others deeply instead of merely being remembered pleasantly”. Some days, you have to ask yourself if you are really living in the deep unforgettable category or just pleasant quickly forgotten?

1 comment:

Nettie said...

Sometimes its nice to be the small fish. Everyone has such high expectations for the big ones!