splash zone pew

Anyone who has been to see shamu at sea world knows about the splash zone- where you are guaranteed to get wet- The metal benches are clearly marked SPLASH ZONE- I think they need these for our church. Today our friends jessica and patrick (and their kids) sat in front of us. And throughout the services they were "splashed" with various objects- einstein action figure, plastic medical play scissors, puppets, plastic pig, plastic cow, and small vw bus, flannel board pieces, etc. etc. Additionally smart baby was brushing peoples backs with a toothbrush. Really I am a good mom In my defense, please note that I sit alone wrangling my boys- creating barricades with scriptures and purses (plus this is during morning nap time) as smart daddy-o is up sitting on the stand conducting the service- peaceably and contemplatively listening to the messages. Smart baby is a master of chaos and short attention span at the moment- opening the hymnal will result in pages being ripped out in a mere second or the book being chucked at something or someone nearby. Today was extra bad as the cheerio snack which normal buys 15 mins of relative distraction during the service was locked in the bishops office on the platter of giant cookies I made for distributing to the fathers after the meeting- so i was forced to break out the "emergency fruit snacks" and feed them to smart baby-a delicacy he has yet to encounter but took to like a duck to water (this comes from a mom who screened preschools for smart son by reviewing their snack menus- only those with daily fruits and veggies were given consideration)...Next week we'll post a sign.