Friday, January 27, 2006

pregnancy tests= scratch off tickets

the thrill of a scratch off card--we've all been there- the one that comes in your cereal box, or publisher's clearinghouse that tempts you with million dollar dreams and Convinces you "YOU MAY ALREADY BE A WINNER". There is a thrill in taking a coin and flaking off that metal covering to see if you have won (But course it always says "sorry, you're not a winner- please try again").

Really thats why those people line up at the customer service desk at my local stop and shop laying down a stream of$5s, $10s- to buy their weekly scratch off and lottery tickets. (I being a non-gambler off course have to hold my toungue from lecturing them on the wasteful expenditure of their money- really one day i almost opened my mouth as the guy in front of me bought 60$ worth- but i was afraid they'd call the police or throw me out of Stop and Shop) I mean how can you throw that money away each week while people are starving and second-- are you too stupid to understand the odds-- you lose-- its how they make money. People still do it though on the chance they might get lucky...

okay end gambling tirade... make connection to pregnancy tests-- for those of us non gamblers pregnancy tests are the best gamblers thrill we get--the "scratch off ticket" of mothers or soon to be mothers the world over--1 minute in the bathroom, little stick... suspense builds as you stare intensely at the line...you wait to see- WINNER or SORRY TRY AGAIN--line or no line--

We want that line and will do anything to increase our odds of "winning"-- it's why we do things like test early (delay of gratifiation not a gamblers skill), buy cheap tests online at 80 cents a pop (Hey i can test 10x for the price of 1- thats 10 thrills for the price of one!), buy more sensitive tests calculate approximate hcg levels for given dpo (anyone who has a relatively good understanding of the reproductive cycle knows you can pretty reliably test before 14dpo)

But like every gambler-- every TTC mother knows you can't stop until you hit the jackpot!
And when you do your life will never be the same...

(For anyone thinking i am ttc- that is a big no-- but as a former master tester- i write in honor of my best friend shelah ttc obsesser extraordinaire!)

8 comments:

ShelahBooksIt said...

I feel honored, but I'm still holding my pee!

emlouisa said...

Rofl! I'm a fan of Dollar store tests. You have to do best out of three but even when you do that it's STILL cheaper than buying a "real" test.

Pamela said...

I used to be a cocktail waitress. So frustrating to see people throw thousands away on nothing.

Pamela said...

I used to be a cocktail waitress. So frustrating to see people throw thousands away on nothing.

Lei said...

Hilarious! You make a good comparison, Les. It is our one vice as LDS mamas!

Linsey Farley Jameson said...

My dh is so happy we wont be ttc again because we will save a FORTUNE on tests. I would take like 3 a day for days before it would have shown. I am overanxious and totally impatient.

MusicalMom said...

lol! You hit the nail on the head with that post. :)

Rachelle said...

So true! Although with IF, I began to hate those tests and refused to take anymore. As we get ready to start ttc again, I think I will take out some stock in pg test companies.